Fear of Commitment
I have a theory about my fear of commitment.
First I admit I have said fear. However, I have a theory.
I think that fear of commitment is really not the fear of having someone to depend on. It's not a fear that there is someone you need to have near you or in your life to be happy. In fact, finding someone to be enamored with or interested in being with is actually pretty easy.
What's terrifying is finding out that there is someone who is equally enamored with you or just as interested in being with you.
That implies that someone wants to be near you, to have you in their lives. Gives me shivers just thinking about it. In fact, it is easy to be interested in someone all the way until the moment you realize they are taking it seriously and then quickly back away as though that person is not the one you were interested in up until that point. Suddenly there are a million reasons why that person is all wrong for you and they just keep piling up every time you're confronted with the situation. It actually makes interactions feel awkward all of a sudden.
The problem with this fear is that although it can make you terrified of spending time with or being with this person, it doesn't get rid of the actual interest you had in the first place. Something should be done about this.
Boy is it easy to see this when you are outside the situation.
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